Okay, I’ll admit I don’t particularly care for tattoos to begin with. But they’re very popular, and it looks like they’re here to stay, at least until you pay for laser removal. But if you are one of the apparently growing number of people who think it’s okay to tattoo cleavage, you are definitely weird.
Ink-stained wench
A significant percentage of us guys think that tattoos detract from a woman’s looks. When we see an attractive woman with tattoos, we are repelled rather than intrigued. Our reaction does not involve an appreciation of the artistic merits of the skin illustrations, or curiosity about what wanton personality traits the tattoos might indicate. Our reaction is more along the lines of, “Oh, that’s a shame…someone drew stuff all over her…she’s permanently stained.”
Oh, the humanity!
Take Angelina Jolie, for example. A beautiful woman, but she has weird stuff tattooed all over her body. But at least she’s left her cleavage alone. So far…
Tattoos on an arm or a leg? Not so bad; I can usually pretty much ignore those. Tattoos on the lower back, just above the butt crack? Sorry, that kind of grosses me out.
But on the cleavage? Tattoos on the cleavage? What in God’s name are you thinking? Ladies and gentlemen, brothers and sisters, this is sacred ground. Breasts are precious natural treasures. You simply do not draw stuff on precious natural treasures. It’s like spray painting graffiti on the Grand Canyon.
Why mess with a good thing?
Cleavage is naturally beautiful and perfect in its natural, unadorned state. There is no need to attempt to improve on perfection. Ask any man, and a certain percentage of women. We are drawn to cleavage like moths to a flame. If you put a television set right next to a display of cleavage, we would watch the cleavage…unless there was a television show on that featured lots of cleavage, in which case our eyes would tend to dart back and forth.
So there is absolutely no need to tattoo your cleavage. For the love of God, leave it be! It’s perfectly fine the way it is. If you tattoo your cleavage you will ruin it for everyone, or at least everyone who thinks like me. And if you then proceed to prominently display your tattooed cleavage, you will also be officially WEIRD. But feel free to keep that regular cleavage coming…
